How to Become the Most Confident Version of Yourself & Step Into Your Power
The Mel Robbins Podcast
How to Become the Most Confident Version of Yourself & Step Into Your Power
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AI Summary
In this powerful episode of the Mel Robbins Podcast, bestselling author and pastor Sarah Jakes Roberts shares her transformative journey from teenage pregnancy at 13 to becoming one of the most influential spiritual voices today. Sarah opens up about spending 10 years wrestling with shame and trying to fit into different versions of herself before learning to embrace her complete story. Through vulnerable storytelling, she reveals how she moved from self-punishment to self-compassion, ultimately discovering that healing requires both sitting with yourself and choosing love over condemnation. The conversation explores profound themes of self-forgiveness, identity, and stepping into your power. Sarah introduces the concept of 'but also'—the idea that we can be defined by our past mistakes AND our achievements, our struggles AND our strength. She emphasizes that people vastly underestimate how necessary their existence is in the world, and this underestimation causes them to assume a posture of resignation rather than owning their power. Throughout the episode, Sarah provides practical wisdom on how to stop dragging the past around, embrace all facets of who you are, and recognize that your life is not random but purposeful. Her message is clear: you cannot heal while punishing yourself, and the greatest gift you can give yourself is allowing love to flood the places where you once felt emptiness.
Key takeaways
- 01You cannot heal while punishing yourself—sitting with yourself must be done with intention toward compassion and love, not continued self-criticism
- 02Embrace the 'but also' mentality: you are not just one thing or one mistake, but a beautiful tapestry of all your experiences, struggles, and achievements combined
- 03Most people underestimate how necessary their existence is in the world, which causes them to not take their healing, thoughts, and impact seriously enough
- 04Stop trying on different versions of yourself to fit in with others; instead, learn to 'stand flat-footed' in the truth of who you are and fit within yourself
- 05Your life is not random or coincidental—you were given this life to make your corner of the world better, and that responsibility requires taking yourself seriously
Timestamps
Topics
Guests
Companies mentioned
Quotes
"You cannot heal while you are still punishing yourself."
— Sarah Jakes Roberts
"I had to sit with myself until I no longer cringed. I had to sit with myself until I no longer felt shame. I had to sit with myself until I could experience compassion where I once felt guilt."
— Sarah Jakes Roberts
"Most people underestimate how necessary their existence is in the world. And as a result, assume a posture of resignation that leaves the world less than what it could be."
— Sarah Jakes Roberts
"I'm not trying to disconnect from who I was. I'm trying to bring all of who I am into the fullness of where I am."
— Sarah Jakes Roberts
Transcript
Hey, it's your friend Mel, and welcome to the Mel Robbins Podcast. Today, I'm going to answer a question that I get asked from listeners of the Mel Robbins Podcast around the world. I get this question almost every day, and this is the question. Mel, who do you listen to? When life gets hard, when the world seems overwhelming, when you feel discouraged or beaten up by life, who do you listen to, Mel? Who's the voice that gives you hope? That opens your mind and your heart? Who's the person that you can listen to all day long? You know, someone who just makes you feel like everything's gonna be okay. That you have the power to meet the challenges of your life and not be defeated or defined by it, but to emerge stronger, wiser, better. And that one person that I, Mel Robbins, turn to is best-selling author and pastor Sarah Jakes Roberts. So today, I'm gonna share the conversation with you that I had with her. It's one of those episodes that we've recorded on the Mel Robbins Podcast that I personally turn to over and over again. And I also continue to share it with anyone in my life who needs hope, motivation, optimism, and the reminder that yes, change is possible. You are so much more powerful than you know, and today, Sarah Jakes Roberts will convince you of that. And in particular, if you or someone you love is tired of beating yourself up about the past, or you're feeling like your life is just never gonna get going in the right direction, I'm gonna tell you something. You'…